4 Secrets To Making A Long Distance Relationship Work

“Distance is NOT for the fearful, it is for the BOLD.  It is for those who are willing to spend a lot of time alone in exchange for a little time with the one they love.  It is for those who know a good thing when they see it, even if they do not see it nearly enough.” 

-Meghan Daum

Long distance relationships seem to be under constant scrutiny.  Many people believe that long distance relationships do not work and many family members discourage them.  Yet they are becoming more and more common in today’s day and age.  People are often in  long distance relationships out of necessity.  Both men and woman are finding it necessary to make moves for their careers and have to live near their work.   Additionally, there are military couples with families who regularly deal with being in a long distance relationship.  Life happens and sometimes that means that people have to live far apart from each other.  In some ways, technology has helped close the gap in long distance relationships, but it still has its challenges.

My partner and I have been together for over 4 years and have stuck together through 3 long distance relationships.  In fact, we are currently far apart, but have found ways to stay close even when we are thousands of miles apart.  Through the years we have figured out tips and tricks that have helped us get through our long distance relationship.

Here are 4 Secrets To Making A Long Distance Relationship Work:

  1. Schedule in the time: You may be far apart in proximity, but you can still find ways to be close to each other.  “Scheduling it in” is helpful because sometimes you will be dealing with time differences. My significant other and I make it a point to talk each other before bed and do our best to stay consistent with the time range.  Of course we talk a lot more than that video call before bed, but all other communication feels like a nice bonus.  Communication is key in all relationships and even more so when long distances are involved.  Find creative ways to communicate with each other.  Send texts, love letters, messages, video chat.  At the same time, you do not have to be in constant communication.  Remember that distance makes the heart grow fonder.
  2. Set Ground Rules: Trust is more important than ever when you and your loved one are far apart.  It is important to set healthy boundaries for each other.  This will help you manage your expectations.  For example, what is your commitment level to each other?  Are you two exclusive?  It is important to have these open conversations with each other.
  3. See it as an opportunity for growth: It may be challenging to be so far apart, but this is also an opportunity for both of you to grow as individuals.  One of the most important lessons that my significant other and I have learned through the years is that it is important for both of us to have some alone time and still be strong individuals.  When you are both individually strong then when you are together you will be stronger than ever.  In our current long distance relationship, I have been focusing a lot on my nutrition and working out consistently.  I am looking forward to being reunited with my man and thrilling him with my transformation.
  4. Set an end-date: Nothing changes the fact that being apart is hard.  Communicate openly with each other and create a plan that includes an end-date.  It is exciting to count down the months, then weeks, then days!

I hope that these secrets will help you and your significant other to stay close even if you are living far apart.  A long distance relationship is an opportunity to practice trust and to also be trustworthy.  Remember that earning and keeping trust takes work from both people.  Most importantly remember that you are in this together and together you can get through anything.

What is important to you in your own long distance relationship?  Please comment below to share!